thailand bloooooop

i've just been browsin thru everyone's blogs and readin abt da trip over and over again has made me think abt it. da kids will never cease to amaze me. i love dem so much. it's just so hard on da kids. losin their loved ones and all. and when finally they meet ppl whom dey truly regard as friends, everyone is separated all over again. it's really hard on dem. it's no wonder dey were cryin their hearts out on da last day. for once some people actually bother to listen to them, to play with them, to help them. everyday we would head over to da skool, and when our buses would pull in, dey would cheer and smile, cuz dey're so freakin happy.

i'm not really a community service kinda person, and yet all this has made me feel dat everything has been worthwhile (yes, even da toilets). even though we couldnt really communicate with each other, da bond was still dere. and dey have seriously touched me. da way dey hold your hand and tell you not to cry, not to feel sad. knowin dat dey probably feel worse, dey're much much worse off, and yet dey still try to comfort you. da way dey come over and hug you. these little things really matter. it really means a lot. and i think everyone feels da same way. i just dun get it. why are these kids da ones who are sufferin when dey din even do anything wrong? dey're probably da sweetest kids i know.

but sometimes it really hurts when u look into their eyes, and see all da sadness dere. and dey're tryin to act all cheery and happy on da outside. dey're just little kids, and yet dey have gone thru so much. much more den anyone of us will ever go thru. argh i probably sound so uhhhhh now. lol. what da hell is uhhhh? hahaha.

da trip has changed my outlook on many many things. da trip was fun, yes, but i'm pretty happy to be back here in a way. why? i doubt you'll understand, but it's alright. it's for me to know and for you to find out. =)